I’d like to reach out now to the couple who is NOT experiencing sex and intimacy in a way that both parties are satisfied with.
If you value your relationship, and if you value each other, listen up!
If you love each other, no matter how far gone the intimacy is, how old you are, how physically unfit you feel, or what the actual current levels of desire are in your relationship, you can change things.
I run across people every day who are desperately lonely and unhappy in their relationships due to lack of intimacy. They are trying to fill their lives with all kinds of things from work, to food, to porn, to prostitutes, and most feel completely hopeless. There is NO viable substitute for intimacy. I urge you as a COUPLE to seek solutions. I offer sessions myself, and encourage you to go to anywhere you feel will work for you. The health of your relationship depends on it. Chances are it will be the the more active of the couple that comes across this article, as the low desire or more withdrawn person generally does not want to hear it. Please share, and this note is for the one with no desire: Your needs are as important as your partner’s, and I am telling you that there is nothing that you can do that is more painful than not engaging intimately with them. Nothing. They are hurting right now desperately. You do not have to be a martyr, but it’s not okay to live like this long term. I urge you to open your mind to the idea of making some changes that work for both of you, and increase both happiness and personal fulfilment within the relationship.
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